Wednesday, July 8, 2009

I'll die...

Okay, I don't believe this. But, it makes me ponder what I would do if it were true.

I don't see Rob deciding to shag her, unprotected, in the height of his career. Why would he take the chance of gettin' her pregnant when he's in the prime of his career? Better yet, why would he have sex with her AT ALL!?

I understand Rob has a penis, and having a penis means that there's only one thing on your mind at all times. SEX. But, we are talking about Robert Pattinson here. He could have ANY woman in the world, whenever he wanted her. So, why would he waste his energy doing the bump and grind with a girl like Kristen Stewart?! A one-dimensional actress, who always looks like she's constipated. She never smiles, she never laughs, and she's just plain out ODD. not to mention the fact that she's currently sporting a MULLET!!! Need I say more?!

Robert Pattinson on the other hand is the definition of BEAUTIFUL. I'm not saying I want him to be like every other guy, who goes around sticking his Oscar Meyier in any old bun around just because she's hot. I want him to respect women, but atleast boink the women worth the consequences.

If she were pregnant to Robert, that means he'd be stuck with her in his life for ATLEAST 18 years. 18 years of agony for that poor man. I'm betting he can't wait until he's done filming the remaining films of the Twilight Saga so that he doesn't have to suffer anymore. But, I could just be biased.

All I'm saying is this. Rob, if it is true, file for sole custody, cut offall ties from her, and for God's sake don't feel compelled to get married. I don't think I could handle it. Kristen Stewart-Pattinson. Yeah, I just threw up in my mouth.

I think Jesica Moffett-Pattinson has a better ring to it.

Friday, July 3, 2009

Oh my..

This may be the hottest thing I've ever seen. Seriously.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Robert Pattinson & kids...

So, stumbling upon the pictures from the shoot of "Remember Me" I ran into a couple pictures that made my heart melt. Take a look:

Now seeing Rob interact with his little co-star made me think about what he's going to be like when WE have kids. I mean, in my sick little fantasy world that I live in, we will have children.

I wonder if Rob will be on of those dads who doesn't allow their daughter to date until she's 20, remembering what he was like when he was her age and knowing what he wanted then. Just pure booty. Or, I wonder if he will be a dad who meets his daughters dates at the front door with a shotgun? I wonder what his face would look like when his daughter wants to talk to him about sex?

All these thoughts run through my mind when I think about Rob being a dad. I bet he will be the most badass dad ever. Considering that he never changes clothes, showers, or brushes his hair. And the fact that he loves to smoke a pack of cigarettes while consuming 3 beers at the local pub. And he can get ALL the ass he wants! His kids will look up to him for being the biggest and hottest British pimp there is.

So, I've concluded that no matter how many kids Rob and I have, he'll be a wonderful father. I'll leave the punishing up to him, though.

Especially if he's goin' to punish the kids by biting them!